Change of pace

I’ve been neglecting the site big time. And I’m not going to apologize. I think for a while I lost interest. Maybe I just lacked ambition, motivation, inspiration. I don’t know. All I know is I just haven’t had time to do anything. Work has been crazy. With my new promotion, I got crap hours. Some nights I work til 10:30 pm only to get up and come back into work at 7:30 am. Then on the weekends they have me working 6am until 2 pm, after working until close throughout the week. It’s just a big mess and I’m stressed and I hate it. I’m basically a part time manager, who doesn’t have that title or pay, I just do all the work. It kind of sucks and I wish if they were going to use me, they’d at least pay me more or something.

I get 2 days a week off if I’m lucky, one spent catching up on sleep or relaxing and the other spent catching up with my friends. And with the weather we’ve been having lately I don’t want to spend a single minute inside. Things are just really crazy for me right now. I have so much to do and so many thoughts going at once I don’t know where to begin. I’m feeling very overwhelmed and run down. I’m trying not to let things bother me as much, but it doesn’t seem to be working. I’m at that point where I think I just need a major change in my life, and the change will be according to me. Cause normally every change that occurs in my life is because of someone else. But we’ll see.

I’ve been thinking a lot about moving out of my hometown. When I was younger I always said that the day I graduated would be the day I left this town for good. But because of a guy I ended up putting my dreams on hold and stayed. Only to have the relationship end a month after I graduated, so it was a waste. But I don’t regret it at all. Because in the last 3 and a half years, I’ve made some great friends and some great memories. But also with those great ones comes bad ones. And as much as I’d like to admit, those bad memories get to be too much sometime. There are people in this town that I can’t avoid even though I want to. They’ve been so horrible and nasty to me and maybe I do deserve it, but I think it’s about time to grow up. There are people I used to be friends with and it hurts to see them and know that we’re not friends anymore. There are people I’m still friends with who I don’t want to be but I can’t let go.

I’ve talked to Jordan about this move and he is less than thrilled. He told me that he wasn’t going anywhere, and if I wanted to go then I could. Breaking up with my boyfriend of 3 years is not the change I was talking about, so I guess I’m kind of stuck in this miserable town surrounded by people I hate and working at a job I hate. Jordan thinks that I’ll be better if I just get a new job, but it’s so much more than that. I just need a change of pace, a change of scenery, a change of stuck up snobby slutty people. But I guess I’ll be here for a while longer. Anyone have any suggestions on what I could do to change things up in my life? Keep in mind that I live in a small town with nothing to do and nowhere to go.

Anyway, I have a new layout. Not much, but it needed to be changed for sure. Maybe if I get time I’ll create a better one, but I doubt it. I’m going out today with my sister to take photos. This is a long shot, but if I ever get around to it I’ll post all the ones I’ve taken on here. I have them on my facebook fanpage, so if you’d like to know that just give me a shout and I’ll send you the link. You won’t be disappointed I’m sure.